#moms against canada

[fennecfiree]

I HAD TO

I just found this on Pinterest...

and I had to...

[timecryptid]

I love the idea of when Kyman has a kid together they give the kid Cartmans last name for some reason and when teachers see the last name at first they’re all fine because sure this means the kid might be a little bit of a hard student it’s going to be fine.

And then they’re worried once someone reminds them about Kyle. And they all have to hope that he doesn’t become his mother and isn’t in every other day to complain (he turns out just like his mother and is in fact there every other day to complain)

[ashleybenlove]

Diverse Cartman just asked if Kyle's mom is still a big fat bitch in this universe.

Yes, she is.

[allofthebeanz]

Yes, I know it was the 90s, but do you guys think it would've been interesting for Fraser to be Inuit and British? Like his mother or maternal grandparents could've been Inuit

[moongay]

i don’t want a job i just want to do drag and SLEEP i feel like i deserve that

[autumnoakes]

i hate how much is related to fields of business just because of the money in it all like?????

[schnitzelsemmerl]

what if somebody animates odysseus and his crew to "mountain town" from south park but instead of being hyped to watch the terrence and phillip film they are hyped to go home /j

[wlntrsldler]

poisoned mercury | lifestyles of the rich & famous

i. lifestyles of the rich and famous by good charlotte (introduction)

a/n: introductory chapter! introducing the dynamics of the band, luke's relationship with his mom, and teenage boy antics. pre-reader and pre-chb. things will pick up quickly after this, i promise! bear with me as i set the scene :)

series masterlist | previous | next

“why the fuck am i seeing tabloids on top of tabloids with my kid’s plastered face on the front page of all of them?” 

luke winced at the sound of his mom’s voice echoing through the empty event space. chris covered the bottom half of his face with his shirt, trying to hold in his laughter. may castellan was in her usual pantsuit, high heels clacking against the floor, as she waved around trashy magazines. she was furious. 

“ignoring the fact that you are not 21 years old and cannot legally drink, what were you thinking, luke?” travis dropped his drumsticks on the ground, motioning for chris and connor to follow him backstage. they’d seen luke get chewed out by his mom more often since they started their world tour. as the three boys walked toward the side of the stage, may turned to them. “none of you are off the hook either. you may not have been on the front page, but care to listen to what they said about you in one of their glorious articles?” 

“i would actually prefer not to, mama castellan,” chris mumbled, suddenly feeling caught. all traces of humor instantly drained from his face. luke couldn’t help but scoff, the boys always gave him shit for getting yelled at by his mom, so he was glad that this time around they were all on the sinking ship. 

she dramatically cleared her throat, opening up one of the magazines. luke grimaced at the sight of him on the front page. he was sitting on the curb, his sunglasses askew, with a girl awkwardly patting his back. he doesn’t even remember this. may shot daggers at chris, who was cowering behind his mic stand, “bassist of poisoned mercury, chris rodriguez, was photographed away from the band when he was caught outside smoking something that wasn’t a cigarette, if you catch our drift. hopefully, his habits don’t catch up to him anytime soon.” 

she stared at the stolls next, “drummer and lead guitarist of the rising band, travis and connor stoll, didn’t miss out on the fun. they walked out of the club with two models, who looked like twins, along with a bottle of dom perignon before heading into their suv.”

“and my darling child,” her words were sweet but her tone was anything but. luke chewed on the peeling skin of his bottom lip, “superstar, teen heartthrob, poisoned mercury lead singer, luke castellan, had a great night as seen in these pictures. the resident bad boy had one too many, it seems, as he walked out of the club stumbling with a mysterious blonde under his arm. castellan couldn’t make it into the car and had to sit on the curb to puke his guts out. let’s hope his actions didn’t ruin his chance at a budding romance.” 

may closed the magazine, arms on her hips. she waited patiently for one of the boys to speak up. 

“in our defense, this was in canada,” luke tried to reason, scrunching his face up. “legal drinking age is 18.” 

that was the wrong response, luke realized, when his mom’s eyes lit up in anger. she let out a breath, “you were in toronto where the drinking age is 19, which you weren’t until yesterday.” 

“i did not know that the drinking age in canada varied by region. i always learn something new whenever i talk to you, mama castellan,” travis said, trying to lighten the mood. connor shot him a look, motioning for him to quit talking. may castellan was clearly not in the mood for jokes. 

“i am tired of you guys acting reckless,” she roared, dropping the magazines. they fell with a heavy thud. she rubbed her temples with the pads of her fingers, “your parents trusted me to take care of you guys while you chased your dreams and this is what you’re doing under my watch?!” 

seeing his mom at her wit's end made luke feel sick. 

“mom,” luke hopped off the stage, ignoring the sound of the magazines ripping under his feet as he landed on top of them, “we’re sorry. i’m sorry.” 

“sorry’s not gonna cut it anymore, luke,” may said, shaking her head. “after this tour, you guys are taking a break. no touring, no public appearances.” 

“what?” connor exclaimed, joining luke off the stage. the other boys followed, looks of bewilderment evident on their faces. “w-we can’t take a break now!” 

“yeah, c’mon, mama c!” chris added, shaking his head, “we’re just getting really big. if we quit now, we’ll lose this momentum.”

“you’re not quitting. it’s just a tiny break– three months,” she cut them off, raising a hand in a stop. “we’ll release a statement to the press saying you guys will be taking some time off to work on your sophomore album so people have something to look forward to when you return.” 

“okay, so that’s the cover story,” luke ran a hand through his curls. he knew that there was no winning against his mom when she made up her mind. he looked at her and spoke before the rest of the band continued their protests, “but what are we actually gonna be doing?” 

“you’re going to spend your summer in montauk, just like old times,” his mom explained, voice still stern. “you’re going to camp half blood.”

-

“what the fuck is a camp half blood?” chris asked, plopping down on the couch they had inside their dressing room. rehearsal was cut short following the news delivered by luke’s mom. 

“it’s a music camp,” luke explained, fidgeting with random things sprawled across his desk, trying to find the pack of cigarettes he hid. he really needed to clean up. “my dad used to take me there over the summer when i was younger.”

the topic of luke’s dad was a sore subject for him. his dad left him and his mom when he was 7 for some young waitress from their hometown diner. one second, he was signing up for little league with his dad as the coach; the next, he was sitting in the hallway listening to his mom cry after his dad packed a bag and left town with wendy the waitress in the passenger seat. luke hasn’t heard from him since then. last he checked, his dad was lounging beachside in santa monica with his third wife who was definitely too young for him. as far as he’s concerned, his dad was dead to him. 

but he couldn’t deny that his time at camp half blood was the place of origin of some of his best childhood memories. he got his first taste of what it was like to be on stage at camp half blood; the adrenaline coursing through his veins, the pounding of his heart at the applause, the wild images in his head about what it would be like to be known for his music-- it all started at camp half blood. he was his happiest at camp, at least before his dad ruined it for him. 

“is it fun?” travis asked, twirling a fresh pair of drumsticks between his fingers. 

“used to be, yeah,” luke chuckled, hoisting himself up to sit on the desk. “haven’t been there since i was seven.” 

“dude, i do not want to hang out with a bunch of little kids all summer,” chris groaned, letting his head fall back against the wall. 

“relax, rodriguez,” luke lit a cigarette, inhaling the smoke before continuing. “there’s two sides to the camp. we’ll be with the older kids.” 

“oh shit, is camp half blood mr. d’s music camp?” connor asked. the name of the camp was starting to sound familiar to him.

luke took another drag, nodding, “that’s the one.” 

“dude, i fucking love mr. d. he always has the wildest stories,” travis laughed, “he’s so mellow and chill now, i wouldn’t’ve ever guessed he used to be like that.” 

“it was the 90’s,” chris shrugged, “pretty sure everyone was like that at one point.” 

“paid off for him though,” connor replied, opening a bag of doritos. he offered a chip to his brother, who in return, snatched the bag for himself. connor rolled his eyes, reaching over to grab another one. he was used to this. “i mean being a ceo of a multi-million dollar recording company isn’t too shabby.” 

luke hummed along, mindlessly, letting the chatter of his bandmates fill the air. the three boys fell into a conversation about the last time they saw mr. d at the recording studio when they were finishing up the vocals for their debut album, but luke’s mind was far away from the topic at hand. he couldn’t shake the feeling of disappointment from his body. he knew the way his mom looked at him would haunt him for the next few nights.

it wasn’t like he was actively trying to disappoint her– really, he wasn’t, but he just gets so caught up in the noise of fame that he forgets how to act under the pressure. there was something about his mom breaking down in front of him because of him that tore him apart. he felt guilty. his mom didn’t ask for this life, she didn’t even want it. she was content being a suburban mom in westport, connecticut, but she gave up her comfy life to let luke live out his dreams of being a musician. 

he was lucky, he knew that. not every mom would be on board with her kid dropping out of traditional high school to perform rowdy songs about teenage angst, but may castellan was okay with it because she loved luke so much and wanted him to be happy. so when poisoned mercury got a record deal with olympus records, she didn’t hesitate to drop everything and go on the road with four unruly teenagers, promising their parents that she’d take care of their sons. 

sometimes, he thinks about what his mom sees when she looks at him. he wonders if she still recognized him, the him before all the fame got to his head. 

he was may castellan’s little boy. the boy who used to beg his mom for chocolate chip cookies after a bad day at school, who used to knock on her door in the middle of the night wondering why he wasn’t enough for his dad to stay, and who cried when she got him his first guitar on his tenth birthday. for most of his life, it’s always just been him and his mom. 

now, at 19, luke didn’t know who he was anymore. he was just going with the flow, doing whatever, doing whoever, his fame and his status threw his way. he did what any teenage boy would do in his position– he drank, he smoked, he had fun, maybe too much fun, sometimes. it’s a rockstar’s life, his wildest dreams come to life, but it was a distraction, mostly. luke wasn’t brave enough to face the music just yet, so he dove into this fantasy head-first, too afraid to look back.

except sometimes, he fucks up really badly, like in toronto, and he’s forced to deal with the consequences of his actions. one time, his mom cut the band off from playing video games on the tour bus for a month after a heated argument between the four of them caused them to cancel a show. the argument was stupid. luke was adamant that scorpions did not have the same mental capacity for understanding pain that humans do and that did not bode well with travis. rehearsal ended in a brawl because travis kept doing impromptu drum solos to drown out luke’s voice. his mom was pissed that hundreds of fans were disappointed over the canceled show and it was all because they couldn’t agree over a damn scorpion. 

another time, she banned them from driving the golf carts around the venue when they crashed it into a very expensive sound system in portland. they ended up owing upwards of $4,000 for the damages and were banned from playing at the event space ever again. the four of them laughed about it when the chaos of it all subsided, and they were fine not playing at the house of hades again, but they did miss the snack bar they set up for visiting talents. chris said he still dreamt about the pomegranate juice ‘til this day. 

luke can look back at the punishments over the years fondly now. in the grand scheme of things, none of it really mattered. but going to camp half blood? this was a different type of punishment. 

luke didn’t want to go to camp half blood. the last memory he had of camp was not a welcomed one. plus, after what he experienced on tour, he could think of a million other ways to spend his summer months, and living at a camp with spotty cell service and designated arts and crafts time was nowhere near the top of the list. 

“yo, castellan,” chris’ voice snapped luke out of his thoughts. “you comin?”

luke put out his cigarette against the wood of his desk, “huh?”

“we’re grabbing food, do you wanna go with us?”

luke hopped off the desk, slipping on his black, puffer jacket, “yeah, i’m right behind you.” 

as luke was walking out of the dressing room, adjusting his t-shirt, he saw his mom talking to teddy, their publicist. they were engaged in a serious conversation, no doubt talking about the press release regarding their second album and their hiatus. luke stood in front of the door for a brief moment, a stutter in his steps, not knowing if he should interrupt.

 luke pursed his lips, deciding to jog over to his mom. 

“i think we should post it on the band accounts first before the boys announce it individually. it make–” may furrowed her eyebrows, noticing luke coming closer to her. she turned her body to face him. she looked much calmer now than she did during rehearsals, “hey, what’s wrong?” 

luke shook his head, “nothin’, mom. i just–uh, just wanted to say sorry again.”

“let’s talk later, may,” teddy gave the two of them a small smile before walking away. 

“i’m not changing my mind about camp half blood,” she frowned. “sorry, luke but i can’t have you guys running around all sum–”

“no, no, i know, mom. i-i didn’t come here to try to convince you,” luke looked down at his feet, suddenly feeling like a little boy again. “i just– uh, shit. okay, i’m sorry for toronto. it was a bad time and it’s not fair that you have to deal with the fall out of our shit. and uh– thank you for sticking by us even though we drive you kinda crazy.” 

may laughed, smiling at her son, “you’re my kid. you know i’ll always be there to set you straight.” 

“thanks, mom,” luke chuckled, backing away to catch up with his bandmates. may waved goodbye, making her way to teddy’s makeshift office. before luke left the tunnel, he turned around, “wait mom! last thing!” 

she raised her eyebrows, “what?” 

luke raised his hand in a thumbs-up motion, grinning from ear to ear, “love you!” 

“i love you too, kiddo,” may replied, a hand over her heart. “now scram, i gotta clean up your mess.” 

[wolverigrl]

Farewells and Distractions

Hugh Jackman x reader (actress)

Prepare yourselves for some jealousyyyy! And well, I already have ideas for the next part! I'm so obsessed right now, send help.. :')

Warnings: fluff, angst, nothing more!

Enjoy!

Previous Part

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It was early, far too early for me to be awake, but there I was, driving Hugh to the airport. He sat beside me, quiet, his hand resting on my thigh, occasionally squeezing as if to remind himself that I was still there. I glanced over at him, taking in his profile - the way his jawline looked in the dim morning light, the faint tiredness under his eyes. He was heading to Sydney to visit his family for a few weeks, and I’d be joining him the next week. We had planned it so we could have some time apart and then reconnect, just the two of us, after he spent time with his parents and siblings. But as we drove, the reality of that week apart felt heavier than I expected.

“You have everything, right?” I asked, my voice softer than I intended. I already knew the answer. Hugh was meticulous. There was no way he’d forgotten anything.

“Yeah, I’m all set." he replied, his voice equally soft. He glanced out the window for a moment before turning back to me. “I hate leaving you, though.”

I smiled, but it didn’t quite reach my eyes. “It’s just a week. I’ll be there before you know it, and we’ll have all that time together. Just us.”

“I know,” he murmured, leaning over to kiss my temple. “But it still feels too long.”

We pulled into the airport, and the moment I put the car in park, my stomach flipped. I hated goodbyes, even temporary ones. Hugh reached for his bag in the back seat, and then he turned to me, eyes locking with mine in a way that made everything else seem to fade into the background.

“I’m gonna miss you." I whispered, my throat tight with emotion. I didn’t want to cry - God, it was only a week - but I couldn’t help it.

“I’m gonns miss you too, love." he said, and then he pulled me into a kiss. It wasn’t rushed or hurried like I expected. It was slow, almost reluctant, like neither of us wanted it to end. His lips moved against mine with the kind of tenderness that made me want to cling to him and never let go.

When we finally broke apart, he pressed his forehead against mine, and I felt his breath fan over my face. “I love you." he whispered, his voice barely audible.

My heart skipped a beat. I’d known for a while that I was falling in love with him, but those words… I wasn’t ready to say them yet, not because I didn’t feel them, but because it felt like too much, too fast. I smiled instead, pressing another soft kiss to his lips. “I’ll see you soon.”

He nodded, pulling back and grabbing his bag. With one last glance, he headed inside, disappearing into the terminal. I sat there for a moment, staring at the space where he had been, feeling an ache in my chest that I wasn’t sure how to shake off.

The week without Hugh stretched out longer than I anticipated. I had plans with Ryan and Blake - they were supposed to keep me busy while Hugh was gone - but those plans fell through when Blake called me that afternoon.

“Hey, y/n!” Blake’s voice crackled through the phone. “I’m so sorry, but Ryan and I have to cancel for this week. We’re flying out to Canada - his mom needs help."

“Oh no." I said, leaning back against the couch. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, nothing serious. She just needs an extra pair of hands for a bit. We’ll be gone for a while.”

I tried not to let the disappointment creep into my voice. “No worries. Family comes first. We’ll hang out when you get back.”

After hanging up, I tossed my phone on the couch beside me and sighed. So much for that distraction. I glanced at the screen, wondering if Hugh had texted, but the silence between us was understandable - he was busy with family, and with the massive time difference, we hadn’t spoken much.

As if on cue, my phone buzzed. I grabbed it, expecting a message from Hugh, but instead saw Chris’ name.

CHRIS: Hellooo! What are you up to? I'm in Boston for the week. Scott, Carly and Shana are coming over. Wanna join?

I blinked, a little surprised by the spontaneous invitation, but the thought of spending time with Chris and his siblings sounded like the perfect way to take my mind off Hugh being gone. After a moment of hesitation, I decided to go.

Y/N: Might just take you up on that. Hugh's in Sydney and my plans here fell through.

CHRIS: Perfect! Let me know when you’re coming!

Hugh was busy, and it wasn’t like I was going to spend the week moping around. Plus, I would also meet my other friends, who I haven't seen for a while!

The days in Boston were great. Chris and his siblings were as always easy company, and I found myself laughing more than I had in days. We spent our time wandering through the city, grabbing food at hole-in-the-wall places, and drinking in tiny bars that didn’t care if we lingered for hours. I wasn’t constantly texting Hugh, mostly because the time difference made it hard to sync up, but we exchanged messages when we could even if it was mostly just short messages or a quick selfie.

Y/N: With friends in Boston. One day left! Miss you❤️

HUGH: Hope you have a great time. Miss you too. Can’t wait for you to get here❤️

One night, Chris’s brother snapped a candid photo of us all laughing at some stupid joke Chris had made and posted it on Instagram. I didn’t think much of it at the time - just a fun moment with friends.

After I reposted Scott's photo, I somehow got a weird feeling, because Hugh neither liked nor commented on it. He usually does that with all my posts.

But then my phone buzzed. It was a call from him. I frowned, glancing at the time. It was the middle of the night in Sydney.

“Hey!" I answered, stepping out onto the balcony to get some quiet. “Isn't it late in Sydney? What’s up? Are you okay?”

There was a pause on the other end, and I could hear the hesitation in his voice. “Yeah and yeah I’m fine. Just couldn’t sleep.”

I smiled, leaning against the railing. “What’s keeping you up? Family stuff?”

“Yeah, a little. I miss you." he said, his voice soft, but I could sense something else there too. Something unspoken.

“I miss you too. I’ll be there soon. My flight's tomorrow at noon.” I reassured him, but the nagging feeling that something was wrong wouldn’t go away.

There was another pause before Hugh spoke again. “Yeah okay. Just text me when you're at the airport. What have you been up to?”

“Just hanging out with some friends." I said, hoping to keep things light. “Boston’s been nice. It’s a good distraction.”

“I’m glad." he replied, though his tone didn’t sound completely convinced. I wanted to press, to ask him what was really going on, but something held me back. Maybe it was the distance, or maybe I just didn’t want to have a serious conversation at 3 AM Sydney time.

We talked for a little while longer, mostly about what he’d been doing with his family - going to the beach, having long dinners with his parents. It sounded peaceful, and I couldn’t wait to be there with him. By the time we hung up, I thought things were okay between us.

When I finally arrived in Sydney, I was ready to be wrapped up in my boyfriends arms, to forget about the distance and just be with him. But something was off the moment I saw him at the airport. He hugged me, kissed me, but there was a hesitation in his touch, a distance in his eyes that I hadn’t expected.

“Everything okay?” I asked as we got into the car.

“Yeah, just tired.” he said, brushing it off, but I could tell something was wrong and I didn’t push. Maybe he was still caught up in family obligations.

Over the next couple of days, that distance grew. He wasn’t as affectionate as usual, and when I tried to kiss him or initiate anything more intimate, he pulled back, offering a soft smile but nothing else. It was confusing, and frankly, it hurt.

It all came to a head one evening when we were sitting in his living room, and I could feel the tension crackling in the air between us.

“Hugh." I said cautiously as I looked at his profile. Iis something wrong? You’ve been distant since I got here."

He looked at me, his jaw tightening as if he was wrestling with something he didn’t want to say. “Why didn’t you tell me you were spending all that time with Chris?”

I blinked, caught off guard. “What? I told you I was with friends in Boston.”

“You didn’t tell me Chris was one of them." he said, standing up, pacing now. His hands were in his pockets, but I could see the frustration in the way his shoulders tensed. “I saw your Instagram photo, y/n. You and Chris.. you looked really comfortable.”

I stood up too, feeling my heart race with a mix of confusion and frustration. “I didn’t think it mattered. It wasn’t just me and Chris - his siblings were there too. We’re friends, Hugh. That’s all.”

“I know you’re friends, but that’s not the point!" Hugh interrupted, his voice rising slightly. He turned to face me fully, his eyes searching mine as if trying to find something he couldn’t quite name. "You didn’t tell me. Why didn’t you just tell me it was him?"

I sighed, rubbing my temples. "Because it wasn’t important, Hugh! We were in a group, it wasn’t just the two of us, and I didn’t think it would bother you. Chris and I are over. We’ve been over for years."

Hugh’s face tightened, and he took a deep breath, clearly trying to keep his composure. "But you two were something once. And now you’re still close, still spending time together, laughing together. I trust you, y/n, but… it’s hard for me to ignore the fact that you didn’t think it was worth mentioning."

I stared at him, feeling my own frustration bubbling to the surface. "Are you seriously mad because I didn’t explicitly say Chris was there? You know we’re friends. I didn’t hide it. I didn’t lie to you."

"It’s not just about Chris," Hugh snapped, finally letting the words spill out. "It’s about everything. You didn't even say anything back to me at the airport! I couldn’t help but felt like you didn’t really want this and went to see him. Maybe I’m too old for this, for you. And when I see you with someone like Chris, who’s younger, who shares your world more than I do… I just start to wonder."

His words hit me like a punch in the gut. I hadn’t realized he’d been carrying all this around with him, this insecurity about us, about our relationship. "Hugh, how could you even think that? We talked about the age difference and you were the one who literally said, that it's fine! It doesn’t even matter to me, and it’s never been about that. I didn’t realize you felt this way… you should have told me."

"I didn’t want to burden you with it. Especially after you were concerned about our relationship and the media." he muttered, turning away, his shoulders slumping slightly. "It’s my issue, not yours."

"No, it is our issue if it’s affecting us like this." I said, stepping closer to him. "You should have told me you were feeling like this, Hugh. I don’t want you to feel insecure about us, or about me spending time with anyone. I love being with you and I want to be with you."

He ran a hand through his hair, still not meeting my eyes. "It’s hard. I see how easy it is for you and Chris to be around each other after you have been together and I thought… maybe I’m holding you back and the thought intensified after you didn't say 'I love you' back."

I felt my chest tighten, a knot of frustration and sadness coiling inside me. "Hugh, that’s not true. You’re not holding me back. I’m with you because I choose to be. Chris is a friend, but you’re the one I want to be with. You’re the one I’m in love with. Also you caught me off guard with that and it was somehow too much for me to tell you before we said goodbye."

At that, Hugh’s eyes finally lifted to meet mine. For a moment, his expression softened, but the weight of everything still hung between us. "I don’t want to feel this way, y/n. I don’t want to doubt us."

"Then don’t." I said, stepping closer, placing my hand on his chest, feeling the steady beat of his heart under my palm. "You don’t have to doubt anything. I’m here with you because I want to be, not because I feel like I have to. I love you, Hugh. I love you in ways I didn’t think I could. And I need you to believe that."

He swallowed hard, and for a moment, I thought he might cry, or that I might cry, but instead, he pulled me into his arms. He held me tight, his chin resting on top of my head as he whispered, "I’m sorry. I’m sorry for letting this get to me."

I hugged him back, feeling the tension slowly ease out of him as we stood there, wrapped up in each other. "I’m sorry I didn’t think to tell you about Chris." I murmured against his chest. "I didn’t mean to make you feel like you couldn’t trust me."

Hugh kissed the top of my head, his arms tightening around me. "I do trust you. I just… I get scared sometimes too. It's my first relationship after a long marriage. It's new to me too."

"I know." I whispered. "We’ll figure it out together."

After a few minutes, I pulled away gently, looking up at him. "Do you want to talk more about it, or…?"

He shook his head, smiling softly. "No. I think we’ve talked enough for tonight." Then, his expression shifted, something playful creeping into his eyes. "How about we make some dinner? I know we’ve got some things we could whip up."

I smiled, grateful for the change in tone. "That sounds good. Let’s go cook."

Standing in Hugh's kitchen, I stirred the vegetables as the aroma of garlic and fresh herbs filled the air. Hugh was chopping some tomatoes next to me, the sound of his knife tapping against the cutting board rhythmic and soothing. We'd been talking for a while about upcoming projects - the usual couple interviews and some new film roles hat were coming our way.

He glanced at me with that familiar twinkle in his eyes. "You know, they've asked for some couple interview next month. Think we can manage to look civilized for one hour?" His lips curled into a teasing smile.

I raised an eyebrow, stirring the sauce as I shot him a look. “Do we really have to talk about that now? I thought this was our quiet time.”

Hugh chuckled and set his glass down, pushing away from the counter to move closer to me. “It is, but you know they’re going to ask us sooner or later. They’re all dying for a chance to talk to us - Hollywood’s favorite couple.”

I rolled my eyes, though I couldn’t help but smile. “Yeah, sure. You might be used to the spotlight, but I’m still getting used to it. Besides, I think they’re more interested in you than me.”

He slid up behind me, his arms snaking around my waist as he rested his chin on my head. “Oh, they’re definitely interested in you, trust me. And I think we make a pretty good team. You’re a natural on camera.”

I laughed softly, shaking my head. “That’s because you’re always cracking jokes and making me laugh. You're the one who always makes some smartass comment that gets us off track, but I don’t think I could get through an interview without you by my side.”

Hugh kissed my temple softly, his lips brushing against my skin. “Exactly. That’s why we should say yes to a couple of these. It’ll be fun. We can give them a little peek into our life.”

I sighed, stirring the sauce as I leaned back into him. “Alright, alright. I’ll consider it. But only if you promise to keep it light. No deep-dive, personal stuff.”

He raised an eyebrow, his breath warm against my ear. “No promises. They always find a way to ask the hard questions.”

I turned to face him, my hands sliding up to rest on his chest as I narrowed my eyes. “Then you’re answering those.”

He laughed, leaning down to press a quick kiss to my lips. “Deal. I’ll take the tough ones.”

As I turned back to the stove, Hugh kept his arms around me, his body pressed close to mine as he spoke. “You know, I’ve been getting some new film offers too. There’s one that might shoot in New Zealand next year.”

I felt a twinge of excitement at the mention of New Zealand. “Really? That sounds amazing. Have you decided if you’re going to do it?”

He shrugged, his hands absentmindedly playing with the hem of my shirt as he spoke. “I’m still thinking about it. I want to make sure it won’t take up too much time. I’d rather spend more of it with you.” His voice dropped, soft and intimate, and I couldn’t help but smile at how effortlessly he shifted from teasing to sincere.

I turned to face him again, this time resting my hands on his arms. “You’re really not going to stop making me blush, are you?”

He grinned, leaning down to kiss me again, this time slower, lingering. “Not a chance.”

We stood there, the conversation fading as our lips met again and again, the kitchen suddenly feeling much smaller as the heat between us built. It wasn’t long before the playful kisses turned into something deeper, more urgent, and I found myself wrapped in his arms, pressed up against the counter, his hands sliding up my back as he kissed me like he couldn’t get enough.

Just as I was getting completely lost in the moment, Hugh pulled back, his breathing heavy as he gazed down at me. “There’s something I’ve been meaning to ask you." he said, his voice a little more serious now.

I blinked, trying to focus through the haze of desire. “What is it?”

He hesitated for a moment, his thumb brushing over my cheek as he spoke. “The kids… they’ve been asking about you. They want to meet you.”

I froze, my heart skipping a beat. His kids. I knew this moment would come eventually, but the thought of meeting them, of stepping into that part of his life, made my stomach twist with nerves.

“Oh.." I said softly, my voice betraying my uncertainty. “I didn’t know they’d been asking about me.”

He nodded, his expression gentle but serious. “Yeah. I called them yesterday and they’ve been curious for a while now, but I didn’t want to bring it up until I felt like we were both ready.”

I swallowed, the weight of his words sinking in. “And… you think we’re ready?”

He held my gaze, his hand moving to cup the back of my neck. “I do. But it’s up to you. If you’re not ready, we can wait. There’s no rush.”

I took a deep breath, my mind racing. Meeting his kids was a big step, and the last thing I wanted to do was mess it up. But at the same time, I couldn’t help but feel like it was the natural next step. Hugh was such an important part of my life now, and if his kids wanted to get to know me, maybe it was time.

“I think I’m ready." I said, my voice steadying as I spoke. “I’d love to meet them.”

The relief on Hugh’s face was instant, and he pulled me into a tight hug, his lips pressing against my hair. “You have no idea how happy that makes me." he murmured, his voice filled with emotion.

I smiled against his chest, feeling a mixture of excitement and nervousness. “I just hope they like me.”

Hugh pulled back, his hands framing my face as he looked down at me with absolute certainty. “They’re going to love you. Just like I do.”

I bit my lip, my heart swelling at his words. “I love you too." I whispered, feeling the weight of those words settle between us.

Hugh smiled, his eyes soft as he leaned down to kiss me again, this time slower, more deliberate. “I know.”

We stood there for a few moments, wrapped in each other, the conversation lingering in the air. But as the sauce on the stove began to bubble, Hugh pulled back with a playful grin. “Alright, we better finish this before we burn the house down.”

I laughed, shaking my head as I turned back to the stove. “You’re the distraction, not me.”

Hugh stepped up behind me again, his arms wrapping around my waist as he rested his chin on my shoulder. “You know..” he murmured, his voice dropping to that low, teasing tone that always drove me crazy. “You could be right. But I think you like it and that we may need small breaks in between cooking."

I tried to focus on stirring the sauce, but it was impossible with him pressed up against me like that, his hands sliding up under my shirt, his touch warm against my skin. “Hugh.." I breathed, already feeling my resolve weakening.

“Hmm?” he hummed, his lips brushing against the side of my neck. “You were saying?”

I let out a soft moan, leaning back into him as his hands tightened around my waist, pulling me closer. “You’re impossible." I managed to say, though my voice came out shaky.

“Impossible?” he echoed, his mouth moving down my neck, sending shivers through my entire body. “I think you like me just the way I am.”

I laughed breathlessly, trying to keep the sauce from burning as he continued to kiss my neck, his hands exploring every inch of me. “The sauce is going to- ” I started, but before I could finish, the sound of bubbling and sizzling filled the air, and I realized that it was already too late.

“Shit!” I exclaimed, quickly turning off the stove as Hugh stepped back with a satisfied grin on his face.

He laughed, leaning against the counter as I tried to salvage what I could of dinner. “I told you we needed a break.”

I shot him a look over my shoulder, but I couldn’t help the smile that tugged at my lips. “This is your fault.”

He shrugged, his eyes twinkling with mischief. “Maybe. But I think you enjoyed it.”

I rolled my eyes, turning back to the stove. “You’re lucky I love you.”

“Damn right, I am,” he said with a wink, and I couldn’t help but laugh.

Even when everything else was up in the air - work, interviews, meeting his kids -  knew that as long as we had moments like this, we’d be just fine.

---------------------------------------------------

@spectorrrhgf @tinawantstobeadoll @appetencyfortacos @weskerussy @kellyxo1 @larkkyoris @shukirschtein14 @corvusmorte @carefree-flowerchild @rexmeshlasblog @melmel-fandom @needz1nk @nonamevenus @morganlolitta @angelofthorr @pickuptruck01 @inlovewithcharmers @gaulty74

Next Part

[storiesforallfandoms]

santa's sister in law ~ bernard the elf;the santa clause

word count: 4292

request?: no

description: in which he is adamantly against the in laws coming to the north pole, until he meets santa's sister in law

pairing: bernard the elf x female!human!reader

warnings: christmas fluff, sylvia sucking a little bit but that's just canon

masterlist (one, two, three)

Merry Christmas everyone! 🎄

a special christmas gift for @omeletdreamer 😌

Bernard was firmly against Carol's family coming to the North Pole. He liked Carol, don't get him wrong. She was a fantastic Mrs. Claus, and he loved her idea to start an elf school at the Pole. He understood that it was hard to adjust to life at the Pole, especially while she was pregnant. But bringing outsiders there was a big no-no. They were already pushing things by letting Laura, Neil, and Lucy in on the secret of Santa.

But all of his protests fell on deaf ears. Santa wanted Carol to have her family while he was going to be busy, and the other elves just wanted Carol to be happy. It was a thousand against one. So, Santa got into his sleigh and flew to get Carol's parents while the elves fixed up the Pole to look like Canada.

"This is never going to work," Bernard said to Curtis. "There's no way they're going to think this is Canada. Even if they believe these ridiculous store signs, they'll never believe Canada is inhabited by a bunch of children."

"Can you not be so negative for once?" Curtis asked. "It'll be fine."

"We are seriously pushing it with how many people know about the Pole and Santa. You can't blame me for being stressed out over it."

"Everything will be fine, Bernard. We have a plan. We got this."

Bernard huffed a sigh and walked away. He was tired of being brushed off like this. He didn't become head elf for nothing. He knew what he was doing. If only someone would just listen to him.

As he was walking away, he heard something in the distance. He looked up to see Santa's sleigh breaching through the entrance to the Pole. He couldn't see them yet, but he imagined Carol's parents in there, asleep from Sandman's magic, expecting to wake up in "Canada". He cringed to himself. There's really no going back now.

"I need a hot cocoa," he muttered to himself.

The kitchen elves were busy baking away when Bernard walked in. Carol had told them her mom's favorite cookies so they were hard at work making a batch to welcome Mrs. Newman. They were wearing comically large chef's hats pulled down to cover their pointy ears, which made Bernard glad his hair was long enough to do that naturally.

"Hi Bernard," Abby said, giving him a bright smile upon noticing him. "Want a hot cocoa?"

"I'd love one, Abby," he responded, sitting down at one of the tables.

She rushed off to make it for him. He picked up a cookie from a plate in the middle of the table to eat while waiting. Abby returned with his hot cocoa. He blew on it, disturbing the steady steam coming from the drink. He hoped that escaping to the kitchen would give him some time to prepare for Carol's parents.

He was taking his first sip of his hot cocoa when the kitchen doors opened again and in walked Santa, Mrs. Claus and her family in tow. Bernard nearly choked on his drink.

"And here's our kitchen," Santa was saying. "Oh, and Bernard's here too! Bernard is my, uh, he's my...assistant."

Bernard tried not to roll his eyes at the title.

He reluctantly stood and plastered a smile on his face. "Hi, nice to meet you...eh."

Carol's dad shook his hand while her mom pulled him in for an embrace. Bernard wasn't prepared for a third person to approach; a young woman with a smile so beautiful it left him speechless.

"This is my sister," Carol said. "We didn't know she was coming too."

"I'm (Y/N)," the woman said. "Mom and dad mentioned they were coming for a visit, so I asked Scott if it was alright for me to tag along."

"Of course it would be alright!" Sylvia cut in. "Scott's already had Carol from us for so long, he'd never say no to bringing Carol's loving sister with us to finally see her again."

Sylvia had a smile on her face but there was venom in her words. (Y/N) cringed and tried to ignore her mother's comment. "It's really lovely here so far. I'm glad I could come."

Bernard was still tongue tied. He kept opening and closing his mouth like an idiot trying to figure out something to say. (Y/N) was watching him, waiting, while Scott and Carol shared an amused look.

"Let's show you the rest of the place," Carol said, putting an arm around her sister. "We'll meet up with Bernard again later."

(Y/N) smiled and waved goodbye as the group left the kitchen. Once they were gone, Bernard felt like he was freed from a spell. He let out a long breath and slumped back down to the table. His hot cocoa had cooled down enough that he finished the rst of it in two gulps.

~~~~~~

Bernard was up late that night doing his rounds of the workshop. All the other elves had left for the night, but Bernard was often the last one up making sure everything was shut down and nothing was left out of place. With the in laws visiting, he was also making sure the workshop was locked up so no one would accidentally wander in and discover everything.

He was preparing to leave when he noticed the door to the kitchen was slightly ajar. He was sure all the baker elves had left for the night, but maybe someone had stayed behind. He poked his head into the room and almost gasped aloud when he saw it was (Y/N) who was leaning against the counter, a mug of hot cocoa in her hands. She was in her pajamas, clearly preparing for bed. Bernard was about to back away and leave her be, until she looked up form her mug and caught him. She smiled and waved to him.

"Good evening, Bernard," she said.

There was no escaping now. He stepped into the kitchen and cleared his throat, trying not to seem as weird as he had earlier. He discretely made sure his ears were tucked away under his hair.

"Hi," he said. Simple, easy. You can't mess up a "hi".

"What are you doing up so late?" she asked.

"I could ask you the same thing."

She giggled. "Touché. I was having trouble sleeping so I decided to come out for a hot cocoa. That nice baker, Abby I think? She offered to make me one before she left. I was told she makes the best hot cocoa in all of the town."

"Oh, she does. She's the one you go to when you want a good hot drink made."

"She works magic, I'm sure."

Bernard tried not to let his smile falter. "You have no idea."

A silence fell over them. (Y/N) softy blew on her hot cocoa before taking a sip from it. A small trail of foam stuck to her upper lip as she pulled her mug away. Bernard couldn't stop himself from chuckling.

"What?" she asked.

"You just...you have something..." He gestured to his top lip.

She ran a thumb along her top lip, only smearing the foam more.

"Here, let me." Bernard reached up and wiped the foam off with his own thumb. He was suddenly very aware of their closeness when he looked into her eyes. Any words he could ever say were stuck in his throat yet again and he could only imagine how insane he looked, staring at her with wide eyes.

"Thank you," she said. "And thank you for having us here, too. I know it's a busy time of year for you guys. We don't mean to impose."

It took Bernard a moment to remember the story they had been telling Carol's parents: that Scott was a toy maker in Canada and that's why he would be so busy this time of year and needed someone to be there with Carol while she was pregnant.

"It's not imposition," Bernard assured her. "If anything, I think it's going to make Sa - Scott feel better to have you guys here for Carol while he's working."

(Y/N) nodded. "It's very nice of him to have us here considering how my parents tend to treat him."

Bernard thought back to the comment Sylvia had made earlier. The strained relationship between Scott and his in-laws wasn't anything new to him. Scott had mentioned it a few times before, most recently when he was voicing his concerns about bringing Bud and Sylvia to the Pole with Bernard in private. It was evident that both Newman sisters also noticed how their parents treated Scott, and it seemed neither of them were too happy with it.

"I understand why mom and dad get upset," (Y/N) continued. "One minute Carol was a proud principal at the local middle school, and then the next thing we know she's writing us to tell us she got married to a guy we've never even heard of and moved off to Canada to be with him. I mean, even I was skeptical then. But when she'd write to me about Scott and about being here, it was clear that she was so happy and she found the man of her dreams. Who are we to judge the quickness that they got married? As long as she's safe and happy, which she clearly is. But mom and dad don't see it that way. Dad is still convinced that Scott is a cult leader who stole Carol away or something."

(Y/N) paused and looked at Bernard. He had been listening as she spoke, just nodding along and not saying a word. She chuckled a little and shook her head. "Sorry, I'm rambling on about my family drama."

"No! It's-it's fine. Trust me, I've heard similar stuff from Sa - Scott."

She gave him a look. "You keep stuttering on Scott's name."

"Yeah."

He couldn't think of a better explanation besides that. He felt an unfamiliar burning sensation in his cheeks. He wasn't sure if it was embarrassment or just from being so close to her that made him feel that way. She giggled, though; a sound more beautiful than any of the twinkling bells that were often heard around the Pole.

"I'm just glad to be here," she said. "And I'm glad mom and dad can be here for when the baby is born. Maybe that will help them be a little less harsh on Scott."

She finished what was left in her mug and looked around the oversized kitchen. When Bernard realized she was probably trying to figure out where to put the dirty mug, he said, "Oh, I can take care of that for you."

"Are you sure?"

"Of course. You're our guest, and I can handle this."

She smiled and passed him the mug. "Well, thanks for talking to me, Bernard. I guess I should try to sleep again."

"Goodnight, (Y/N)."

"Goodnight, Bernard." She started towards the door, but then paused to turn back to him. "I hope you're not too busy tomorrow. I'd like to spend more time with you."

His face was on fire as she left.

~~~~~~

For the first time in his thousands of years as the head elf, Bernard wasn't concerned with his head elf duties. Of course he was still there if Santa needed him, but he decided not to spend the entire day in the factory and to seek out (Y/N) to spend time with her. She was delighted to see him and was more than happy to accept his offer to show her around "Canada" for the day.

This became a regular occurrence for a few days. Bernard would make sure to check in often to see if he was needed, but if he wasn't he was with (Y/N). He would feel bad about taking her away from her time with her family, but it seemed her parents were more concerned with fussing over Carol than they were about all four of them spending time together. And (Y/N) also assured Bernard that she was making time for Carol and her family as well as spending time with him.

Bernard was more than well aware he was falling in love with (Y/N), and he was also more than well aware of how bad that was. Elves falling in love was nothing new; he had officiated quite a few elf weddings in his time. But falling in love with a human was out of the question. Elves were immortal, humans were not. Scott and Carol were different - upon becoming Santa and Mrs. Claus, their aging processes had slowed down considerably. They weren't completely immortal, but they weren't aging as fast as normal humans did. But that wasn't possible for a human that an elf fell in love with. Even if (Y/N) felt the same way towards Bernard, she would still continue to age while he would stay the same for the rest of time.

But he couldn't stop himself. He was falling fast and hard. Carol's due date was creeping closer, and once it came it would only be a matter of time before the Newman family would have to go back home, meaning that (Y/N) would leave and likely would not come back. That thought hurt Bernard.

Bernard was approaching where (Y/N) was staying one day when she slipped out of the house instead. He was surprised; she had never left before he had gotten there before.

As he got closer he realized that her face was tearstained.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

(Y/N) jumped and turned to look at him. "Oh, Bernard. Sorry, I didn't see you coming. Nothing's wrong."

He was about to point out that she was very obviously upset over something when the door opened again and Sylvia slipped out. She looked like she was about to say something, but she noticed Bernard and gave him a tight smile, one that he had come to learn was very much her fake smile.

"Hello, Bernard," she said. "I was just having a conversation with my daughter. We were talking about spending the day with Carol. We haven't had an all girls day since we arrived. So, unfortunately, I don't think she'll be able to spend time with you today."

"No mom," (Y/N) said. "I said I would join you later for girls time. Besides, you know Carol has an appointment with the doctor. She won't be ready till later."

Her mother was smiling but her eyes were glaring daggers into the younger Newman girl. (Y/N) held the glare before turning to Bernard and taking hold of his arm. She didn't say anything as she dragged him away. He followed anyways, wanting to get as far away from Sylvia as he could.

"God, I don't understand what is wrong with her," (Y/N) said, letting go of Bernard long enough to wipe the tears from her eyes. "I swear she just doesn't want Carol and I to be happy."

"What was she saying?" Bernard asked.

"Oh, she was going off about the fact that I spend so much time with you. Had her usual rant about Scott taking her precious daughter away from her and dad, and then said she'll be damned if she lets it happen with me too. Basically tried to guilt me into not spending time with you today by saying that Carol was upset that she didn't get to see me much, which I know isn't true because just the other day Carol was saying how happy she was that you and I were getting along."

She shook her head. "I'm so sick of it. It's like she can't wrap her head around the fact that maybe, just maybe, life is so busy here that Carol doesn't always have time to visit. It has nothing to do with Scott being manipulative or a cult leader or whatever conspiracy her and dad have cooked up on a certain day."

Bernard listened in silence. He felt bad that (Y/N) had to have these issues with her mother. Carol was hearing it all now, but he was sure (Y/N) heard much more of it when she was back home with her parents.

None of the Newmans could ever understand the way things were with Carol and Scott. They could never know why things were like this, but they likely wouldn't understand even if they knew.

Unless...

It was an idea that shocked even Bernard that he had it. Head elf of the North Pole, Santa's righthand man himself, considering such a thing? After being so against Carol's family coming to the Pole? It was preposterous. But his brain was so clouded by love for (Y/N) that he wasn't thinking proper.

"Come with me," he said. He didn't wait for an answer, just took hold of her hand and pulled her towards the workshop.

His heart was pounding so hard he could feel it in hips pointed ears. He had to remind himself there was no going back. This was going to be huge, and it could likely get him into a world of trouble.

He opened the doors to the workshop and (Y/N) stepped in. She looked around in awe at the working elves, most of which were not hiding their ears as the workshop was supposed to be off limits to the Newmans. None of them seemed to notice the two of them enter, and if they did, nothing was said.

Bernard watched (Y/N), nervously waiting for her reaction.

"Is this...what I think it is?" she asked him. "No, it can't be. I must be dreaming. I fell and hit my head and now I'm in a coma having a very vivid dream that all of these small people who are supposed to be Canadians have pointed ears like they're elves."

When she looked over at him, Bernard had taken off his hat and allowed his ears to peak out from under his hair.

"I've lost it," she decided.

"You haven't," he assured her. "All of this is real. It's why Carol hasn't been able to visit as much, or why you couldn't visit until now. Look, there's so much to know about all of this. So much that I want to tell you but technically I can't because there are strict rules about humans knowing about the North Pole."

(Y/N) had another quick moment of shock that she was able to very quickly recover from. "Rules that you're currently breaking by showing me...Santa's workshop. By admitting that you're an elf, these are all elves...oh my God, my sister is Mrs. Claus."

"It is all very complicated," he said. "But you deserve to know that Carol is truly happy here. She's not being held against her will, Santa isn't manipulative or holding her captive. He loves her so much that he risked you and your parents finding out about him - about us - so that all of you could be here for her while she's pregnant."

(Y/N) still seemed to be stunned. She looked around the bustling factory again, her eyes wide with wonder.

"Wait," she said. "But...if you all went through so much to make us think this was Canada, to keep who Scott is a secret...then why are you telling me now?"

Because I love you. Because I want you to stay. Because I want to be with you more than anything, even though I know that will never happen.

"Because I want you to know the truth," he replied. "About all of this. About...about me."

She was looking at him. He didn't know what else to say, so he just looked back. He waited for an answer. He willed her to say something, anything.

She didn't say anything, though. Instead, she leaned forward and kissed Bernard. It was quick, almost hesitant, and when she pulled away she looked embarrassed.

"Sorry," she said. "I...should I have done that? I should've asked first. Was it okay that I did that?"

He smiled. "It was more than okay."

"Okay. I'm...I'm going to do it again, if that's still okay."

Bernard chuckled and moved in to kiss (Y/N) first. He had only ever kissed one person before - when he was young one of the other elves had gave him a quick peck on the lips and ran away afterwards. Not exactly something glamorous or anything like that. So he was a little worried about whether or not he was a good kisser. Although, something felt so natural about kissing (Y/N), like he could never do it wrong even if he tried.

He paused when he realized a slight hush had fallen over the workshop. He and (Y/N) pulled away to see that all the working elves had stopped what they were doing to look at the two of them.

"Back to work!" Bernard commanded. They all quickly fell back into what they had been doing before. "Bunch of gossips, all of them. Everyone in town will know about this by nightfall."

"I don't blame them. I'd assume it's not every day that they see an elf kissing a human."

He chuckled. "No, I guess not."

They decided to step out of the workshop to talk more in private. (Y/N) looped her arm through Bernard's as they walked, a gesture that suddenly felt much more intimate than it had before.

"I guess it goes without saying that I can't tell anyone about this," she said. "Not even my parents."

"No. Which I know is a big ask, but we can't have the secret of Santa going around," Bernard explained.

"Not like anyone would believe me. They'd think I was crazy if I went home talking about how my brother in law is Santa and how I started crushing on one of his elves. They'd sent me to an institute for sure."

Bernard smiled at her word choice. So she had liked him this whole time, too. Had it been obvious? Or had she been trying to contain it just as much as he did?

"How...would things work...for us then?" she asked.

It was the question he was dreading. The one he continued to ask himself despite knowing the answer to: it wouldn't. He couldn't let (Y/N) hold on to him when she left the Pole. She'd likely never see him again, which was for the best.

Seeing the look on his face, (Y/N) stopped. "No, do not tell me it's not going to work."

"It can't work, (Y/N). There's too much complications between a human and an elf being romantically linked. It's never happened before, and for good reason."

"There's a first for everything."

He shook his head. "No, there can't be a first for this. I can't let you throw away any other romantic opportunities you have for me. We may never see each other after this visit."

"My sister is married to Santa. There's no way I'm not coming back after this. And besides, long distance relationships are a thing."

"This one would be...very long distance."

She slid her arm from his and took his hand in hers. "I'm willing to try. I like you too much to give up without a fight."

Every rational part of his brain was screaming for him to stop. He could not let things go further. It was better for her if they ended everything after that first kiss and went hteir separate ways.

But the less rational part of his brain was louder than the rest, telling him not to give up this chance at happiness outside of work. He deserved to love and to be loved, just like anyone else in the world. If it worked for Scott, it had to work for him too, right?

He sighed and squeezed her hands. "It won't be easy."

"I don't expect it to be."

"You won't be able to be here a lot unless you're willing to give up everything the way Carol did."

"That's fine, we can make that work."

"And if you do end up coming here permanently, you can't tell anyone who I really am, or who Scott and Carol really are. You'll have to lie to everyone in your life. Is that something you can be okay with?"

(Y/N) stepped closer to him so that their noses were nearly touching. "I'm already lying about Scott and Carol. What's one more lie about the man I love?"

Love.

It was enough for him to abandon all hope at resisting her. He closed the space between them, kissing her again so passionately that it made her head spin. She wrapped her arms around his neck to steady herself, while he wrapped his arms around her waist.

He could've kissed her forever. He could've stood there, wrapped around her and her wrapped around him, the cold nipping at them but barely bothering them, forever. He wanted to take this moment and freeze it, to never have to go back to his busy life as Santa's right hand elf ever again.

But she pulled away first, resting her forehead against his.

"I did promise my mom a girl's day," she said with a sigh. "And I think if I blow her off for this, she'll probably actually kill me."

"I guess I'll have to let you go then."

But he didn't, and she didn't let go of him. They laughed and kissed again.

It would be another several minutes before he would finally (and reluctantly) let her go.

[fennecfiree]

I love Sheila so fucking much she literally looks exactly like my mom. Even the bright red hair

And randy is basically my dad lmao, they have the same personalities I AM LORDE YAYAYA

[skipper1331]

Protective Moms // Jessie Fleming

a/n: based off this request. Hope you like it :)

Matchday.

Canada vs the United States.

Girlfriend vs girlfriend.

Jess and you met in London, both playing for the blues.

The two of you hit off straight away, same interests, same sense of humor, you were similar in many ways but also so different that you completed each other perfectly. It came as no surprise when you revealed your relationship to your Chelsea teammates. They loved you together.

Only the Chelsea girls knew about you though. You both thought it was important to tell them yet you couldn't tell your national teammates. You kept your personal life private which is why you decided to tell them in person and not through the phone.

Considering that Tobin Heath played for Arsenal you could've told her as well as Christen Press but to be honest you were afraid. Tobin was one of the first players to approach you after you had your first call-up. She took you under her wig and became a mentor. So did Christen. You respected them so much and despite the fact that you would do anything for Jess, you were still afraid that Tobin and Christen would be disappointed in you. Or worse, if you introduce Jessie and they wouldn't like her.

As the Call-Up for camp came you were excited. You loved the chelsea girls but you also missed your friends at home. What you didn‘t like though was that you would play a friendly against Canada. There was always a certain rivalry in those games, it was physical, intense and nobody goes down without a fight.

As usual, you wore your headphones on the bus ride to the stadium. Next to you sat Rose, your bus buddy, while Press and Heath sat in the row next to you. They'd be lying if they didn't say that they noticed you checking your phone a lot and smiling at it. However, they didn’t do anything about it. If you wanted to tell them something, they would be there but they wouldn't force you to. They've known you long enough to know how you handle things.

Flem🔥

Can I have your shirt later? x

You

Only If I get yours too xx

Flem🔥

deal

Shortly after the game started, the first slide tackles came from both teams.

The game was balanced, sometimes Canada had their chances and sometimes your team, the goalkeepers definitely had something to do.

Jess and you didn‘t interact much, yes, off pitch you’re a couple but rivals on the field. The only interaction was when Canada had a corner kick and you pressed your body against hers. The canadian would bet that you did it on purpose as your breath hit the back of her neck. It made her go crazy, weak in the knees. Well, after all, it was the first time in 2 weeks that she saw you and could feel your proximity. (Spoiler: whether she had seen you or not, she still would have had weak knees and a racing heart. She always had when she’s near you)

It was 0-0 at half time. A solid result, but not satisfying.

Every single player on the field got more eager to score which resulted in more ruthless tackles.

You were in the opponent's half when Chapman took the ball away from you. Immediately you’re after her to get the ball back. You’re close behind her as she played a pass, her elbow slamming with so much strength in your face, right on your nose. "Fuck" you couldn‘t even scream out of pain because it hurt so much. You fell to the ground as you held your nose, your head hitting the ground. The game continued without anyone noticing that you were lying there. The only one who noticed was the person who caused it, she was standing by your side yelling at the referee. The game was only paused after a number of boo‘s from the stands and as soon as your girlfriend saw you curled up on the floor she ran to you as fast as she could. "Get the fuck away from her!" the brunette shoved Chapman as she kneeled down. She wasn't one to swear, but seeing you on the ground? It turned her into someone else, a protector who must protect you, her girl, at all costs. "Can you take your hands out of your face?" the sweet voice of your girl asked, taking a hold on your wrists. Just as she was about to pull your hands down slowly an angry Tobin Heath pushed her body to the ground, "Don‘t touch her" she hissed. Wrong move. Because when Tobin touched the young Canadian, Sinclair stepped in, "You don‘t touch her"

While Heath and Sinclair provoked each other, Christen went completely nuts on the bench. Still no medic team anywhere near you. Jess was by your side again, your hands out of your face as she could see the blood that was spread across your face. Definitely a broken nose and a possible black eye. You hated blood. You'll immediately feel nauseous and dizzy when you see it whether it’s your own or someone else's. "The medics are almost there, love. Keep your eyes open" her voice laced with worry as your eyes kept closing.

Finally, when the medic team arrived, they tried to stop the bleeding. After a minute or two everything seemed to be fine and you were able to stand up again which turned out to be a big mistake because as soon as you got back on your feet you passed out. They didn't know if it was because of the blood you saw or because the knock was so bad. Either way, you got substituted.

"Sub me off! I need to be with her. Please" Jess begged as she saw you getting carried of the field in the stretcher. Sinc had never seen the small Canadian so desperate while talking to their coach.

Unfortunately, Chris, who actually wanted to be by your side, was subbed on for you.

When Jess got subbed off which was 5 played minutes later she ran to the medic room. She had never felt so helpless.

On the pitch, your mentors played sloppy, everyone could see that your injury effected them. Canada as well couldn't play accurately without one of their key players. The game was dominated by bad passes and missed shots.

"How is she?" Jess questioned as she entered the room, "Broken nose and a little concussion."

You were lying on the bed, your nose bandaged with plasters, sleeping. As the last medic team member left the room the canadian sat next to you on a chair. She held your hand while her thumb stroked over your knuckles.

"I would swap shirts but mine is blood stained" you murmured. Your throat was sore but your face hurt less than before, the painkillers slowly working. "Please don‘t joke" the girl whispered, still not able to calm down "I was so worried"

"My girl, i‘m a fighter-"

The door was swung open as a worried Christen Press entered with Tobin Heath behind her, "Are you ok- What are you doing here?" the same woman asked who pushed Jess away from you.

Frightened, the canadian jumped out of her seat, turning to look at your team moms. Chris with a smile on her face, connecting the dots while Tobs had a scowl on hers. "Um.. I.." your girlfriend stuttered as she let go of your hand.

"Jess is my girlfriend"

"What?!"

You groaned as your head ache got worse due the loud noise, your hands massaging your temples. "What did the doc say?" united states number 23 asked, placing her hand on Tobins back, changing the subject. "Broken nose, little concussion. I need to rest" you answered. Tobin was glaring at your lover who was shuffling with her feet. "We‘ll talk about this, madame" the veteran said before she left the room. She was concerned about you but the news that the canadian was your girl was something she had to process first.

Her little boo with a girlfriend.

She‘d witnessed your highlights, watched you grow in the game, supported you, accompanied you at the lowest point in your career. You had been through a lot together, so maybe it was her pride that hurt because you didn't tell her earlier about your love story and that she had to find out about it through an injury, almost going for Chapman's throat because of that, by the way.

"She‘ll come around" Christen said as she saw how your face saddened, "I‘ll talk to her" she went to your side before she pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead to assure you that everything will be fine.

"Maybe we all could get some coffee?" the suggestion coming from Jessie, "If you want to get to know me? Officially, i mean"

-

A few days later you‘re sitting at a little coffee shop waiting for your team moms to show up. Jess was next to you, holding your hand. It was unclear who was trying to calm whom. The brunette was nervous because she was meeting people you cared so much about and wanted to show them she was worthy of your love and you were nervous because you wanted them to like Jessie.

"Hi" you both greeted synchronously, slightly giggling at one another. "Hey" the dark haired women pressed a kiss to your forehead as she hugged you, carefully not to touch your injured nose. Jess stretched out her hand for Tobin to shake as she repeated her greeting. "Hello" the forward replied, accepting her hand. You felt relief as you saw their little interaction. Christen had definitely spoken to the forward about her behavior a few days ago.

The four of you talked for a while, there was no tension or anything negative. Everybody was enjoying the 'parents meet kids girlfriend'-meeting, it even seemed like scary Tobin Heath liked Jessie but there was this one question on the tip of her tongue that she wanted answered. "Jessie, I need to ask you this" she started as Jess looked at you nervously, your hand finding her thigh, "What are your intentions with y/n?"

She rested her elbows on the table, leaning forward to show her authority, Jess gulping under Tobins stare "Well," helplessly, she looked at CP who, however, was also waiting for an answer. Just because she, in terms of her protectiveness, acted calm and collected didn‘t mean she didn't want a straight answer to the question. She also had to know if your girlfriend was enough for you. "I love her. Umm, we‘re young but.. umm.. hopefully she‘ll be my wife one day" the canadian didn‘t really know how to answer that question. Her intensions were only good ones.

She wants to make you happy.

She wants to make you proud.

She wants to support you no matter what.

She wants to sit in the stands and she wants to cheer for you.

She wants to show you that you only deserved the best.

She wants to love you for the rest of her life.

She wants to be by your side as long as you‘ll let her.

She wants you.

Christen smiled like a proud parent as Tobin grinned widely. Jess looked cofused around, not understanding why the moms looked at her like that, you looking at her with the biggest heart eyes, "Oh no" she said as she understood those faces "I said that out loud, didn‘t I?"

"Jup"

Christen and Tobin got up, "My job here is done", ready to go.

"You chose a good one, y/n/n."

This time it was Christen who commented like Tobin would. In her mind, Heath agreed yet she would never admit stuff like that in prensence of Jess.

But Jessie was indeed a good one.

—————————

pt. 2

—————————

[yeeterthek33per]

Here we go (Steph Catley x Caitlin Foord x Reader)

Very Adulty, Minors DNI, Do not read if you don't want anything 18+,

You'll bounce back, minor part two, was requested.

*I will mark the sentence with a star if you wanna only read up until the spicy point, though.

The cheers of the stadium were ruthless.

Deafening even.

But none of that bothered any of you. All you cared about was the roar of your own teammates as you ran to meet them on the pitch, jumping into the waiting excited arms of your adoptive older sister. (Unofficial, but your family ensured that it didn't matter after their blatant disinterest in your life.)

Charlie's just about screaming in your ear when you meet her in the air, and you match that.

They did it... they beat Canada. Four to nil at that. None of you had been expecting a blowout, not against the olympic champions.

But here you were, standing on the green pitch of the stadium in Melbourne, watching as your teammates, your real family, surround each other, screaming into the electrified air of AAMI Park.

As you drop from Charlie's grip and give her head a slight rub to make sure she still feels fine, your gaze turns to the Canadians, watching as Vanessa Gilles sobs into her teammates, an old friend of yours, having spent your days at Cincinnati together.

You jog over to her, finding Ellie beat you to her Lyon teammate, holding her and telling her how proud she is of the defender.

You grab the girl as soon as she let's go of the aussie defender, pulling her into you and she buries her face into your jersey, you can feel the tears pouring from her eyes as she shakes softly. "Hey Van, I'm so proud of you hun, you've done so well. You played so hard and did the best you could."

You hold her and rub her back for a bit, whispering (more like just saying with the volume of the crowd at this point) words of encouragement to her.

She nods slightly against your shoulder as you do so. She let's go of you after a quick kiss to the temple, and she goes off to find her other teammates in the lockers.

From there, you continue comforting what of the canadian players you can and turn to your teammates beginning to make their rounds around the pitch for the fans.

Each of them have their moment with the crowd, firing them up, throwing their arms in the air. You chuckle watching as Teagan and Sam take their turns, and you run over to the group, taking the opportunity to run into Charlies side, wrapping your arm around her neck and fulfilling that promise you made her a week ago.

She wacks at you and takes off running when you give chase, laughing the whole way. It only ends when one of the training staff grabs her to chastise her for running around while she's on concussion watch as it is.

You only feel a little guilty, though.

As all sisters do.

Mini gives you a slight shake of her head, though, which has you laughing harder, amused but disappointed with you as she walks beside you now.

The shorter woman wraps an arm around you as a wave to the fans, the noise growing louder with each passing acknowledgement.

You're surprised you haven't been defeaned given the level of noise. The support was something you'd never be able to forget. The turnout was amazing, and the warmth it spread through you to see so many people come to watch this game.

"Oi, y/nn, you gonna go see 'em yet?" Mini subsequently points to Steph and Caitlin as they walk just ahead of you, arms around shoulders. You shake your head. "I'll find them later. Let them have this."

She only raises a brow at you, and hip bumps you. You chuckle, but don't explain.

You'd let them have their moment. They spent the entire game on, this was their time, and you could congratulate them later.

Eventually, once you all round the pitch, you return to where the family section was, watching as Katrina climbs the barrier to go see Harper and her fiance, your impromptu second mom now, and Sam goes to pick up her nephew and throw him in the air in the excitement.

You join them in celebrating after a moment, hugging Clara as she cheers into your ear. You're joined by Cha Cha moments later, Harper very indignantly insisting she goes to her favourite player now. Charlie, of course, that is. You pout playfully and tickle her when she giggles at your expression.

She eventually does climb into your arms and gives you the biggest hug of the day, you hold her tight and proceed to blow raspberries into her cheek to which she squeals and holds out for Mum to take her from you. "Mummy, save me!"

Katrina just laughs, and you give Harps over with a grin. Katrina gives you a kiss on the temple when you lean down to hug them both.

Waving your temporary goodbyes with the family, you slip over to Sam and her nephew, giving Sam a playful whack to the butt as you pass by them.

"Oi! Watch it, missy, there are kids here!"

You laugh when she tries to flick you, dodging just out of reach before making grabby hands for the child nestled in her neck. He turns to you and does the same, leaving Sam with a playfully offended look on her face.

She reluctantly hands him over, and you hug him tight before giving him back to Sam's sibling.

You pat her on the back and eventually move to observe your teammates, watching on as they all celebrate with their families. Emily, with her fiance, Ellie, with her dad, Charlie, with her parents and brother.

You know you have the girls, they're your family, you have your girls, Steph and Caitlin, and they're your family too, but you can't help missing what it was like to have your biological parents cheering you on from the sidelines.

They would come to all of your games, and you'd swear they were always the loudest in the crowd, faces painted green and gold and screaming for you with every touch you made.

Too bad that had to end.

They'd stopped coming the moment you announced you were dating a girl. They stopped talking to you. Their last words to you were, "Get out."

You'd been kicked out, and from then, Katrina was very quick to take you in. When she was transferred to the swedish league along with the birth of Harper, the two of you became thick as thieves, soon joined by Charlie and eventually welcoming in Clara.

As much as you missed the cheering, adoring family you once had, you would never exchange it for the family you have now, the one that treats like you like a real human being, with respect and all the love in the world.

Your eyes water a little, overwhelmed by how far you'd come since then, ever glad to have found the family you'd finally been dealt.

You wipe any remnants away quickly, though, and by the time everyone's finished, you're all being urged to return to the changerooms. All haggard but buzzing nonetheless.

The celebrations are rapid to return in the changerooms, dancing around to what you assume is one players speakers blasting Christina Aguilera's "Feel this moment." Being careful not to test your ankle too much with the movement.

You shout out the lyrics alongside your best friend, arm in arm, as beers are passed around for an hour or so. Come time to leave, and everyone's packing up their gear, you hear Tony yell out. "Alright ladies, party hard, but we need you back tomorrow, ready for recovery and our session with cryo. Congratulations, and I'm so very proud of you all."

Whoops and cheers fill the air as you all file onto the bus. You sit next to Hayley, wanting the calmer aura around the winger, as the air around the bus still buzzes with life. You're met with victory chants. (Courteously led by one Lydia Williams herself) and you’re met with cheers and screams around the bus all the way back to the hotel.

__________(stop here for no 18+ stuff at all)

By the time you've all returned to the hotel, you're all more than a little exhausted and slightly buzzed, and yet the others all call out plans to head to one of the local clubs, ready to party further.

You're left with Steph, Caitlin, Katrina, Sam, and Emily, the only group not wanting to exhaust yourselves any more than necessary.

All of you make your way up to your rooms, and you take the opportunity to shower off fully and slip out into the hallway, making your way down to your girls' room.

You're surprised when you don't even have to knock on the door before you're pulled into the room by hands from both girls.

Steph and Caitlin don't waste any time pressing you between them. Steph takes your lips with her own, and you let out a surprised hum against her. The striker behind you has you gripped by the hips, pulling you back into her as she nips at the skin on your neck.

You moan softly, and Steph slips away from your lips and moves kisses down your jawline, down the column of your throat and nips at the skin of your collarbone, tugging softly.

Letting out a breathy groan, leaning back into Caitlin, "I'm so proud of both of you, my group champs." Caitlin's breathy chuckle in your ear sends shivers down your spine.

"I think a little midnight feast is in order, don't you, Stephy?"

The look in her eyes says all you need to know.

*((Smut ahead))

((Seriously, if you don't wanna read smut, don't read ahead, the story ends at the star))

The defender smirks against your neck, looking up into the eyes of the girl behind you before stepping back from you completely to bring her hand up to your chin to tilt your head back to face her, locking gazes with you directly.

"I think, since you've so eagerly suggested as such, you should go first, pretty girl."

Behind you, Caitlin cocks a brow at the suggestion, barely waiting a second before she tugs at the hem of your shirt with a purr.

"Don't mind if I do."

You whine when you don't feel the warmth of your girlfriend pressed against your back. Your shirt is slipped off, and you're pushed back onto the bed with a heavy layer of eagerness.

Caitlin is quick to press down onto you and push you towards the middle before Steph nudges you to lean down on her front as your legs hang from the end of the bed. The striker's knees are pressed on either side of your hips, pinning your lower half to the matress, and she leans down to hover over you.

Her breath fans your neck for a moment as she kisses a path up your throat and takes your bottom lip between her teeth, tugging lightly at it before letting it go. Your chest is almost heaving at this point.

There's a lightheaded buzzing behind your eyes and heat settling in your gut as she kisses you again, sucking at your bottom lip to soothe her earlier ministrations. She then leans up to press a kiss to your other girlfriends lips, and Steph grabs her by the neck to hold her in place for a minute, Caitlin's tongue giving a cheeky swipe at her own, dragging a small groan from the defender.

Caitlin pulls away with a mischievous grin as she keeps her gaze locked with Steph's. She moves down to the floor, knees resting on the carpet as she moves to tug at your training joggers.

You all too happily lift your hips to allow her access, and when you go to grab her to urge her to move closer, you're met with Steph pinning your wrists to the bed below you.

You whine looking up at the defender. She simply chuckles, using your current position to hold you in place, distracting you just long enough for Caitlin to have grabbed you by the thighs to hold you down.

Their hands are hot on your body, and you feel like you're gonna combust at any point.

"Patience sweets, let her take her time, she's earned this meal, don't you think?"

And you can only whimper in response. Although something along the lines of a plea does come through, you're not entirely sure.

Everything feels so fuzzy, but in an ecstatic way.

Steph's lips on yours are grounding, yet they make your head feel light as you're settled back down onto the mattress. Steph's now sitting back on her haunches, hands still tight on your wrists, leaning over you.

Another kiss to your lips is enough of a distraction that the moment Caitlin's tongue makes contact, it has you keening and begging. It's on the fabric of your underwear, but it still has you gasping into the older girl's mouth.

The girl below you loosens her hold on your thighs, running her fingers gently over the skin above the waistband. She slips the tips of her them under the elastic, letting it snap back into place. Once. Twice. Three times. Your hips cant slightly the third time.

"Hold still for me baby." You let out a high pitched whine but keep your lower half planted firmly. She brushes the skin on the inside of your thighs, sending goosebumps down both of them. Before she sits up fully and

"Up."

You do as your told with little fuss, lifting up to allow her to tug the fabric down.

"Cait, please." It's breathy. It's almost whimpered out, but it gets your point across. She chuckles, but relents and her thumb comes into contact with your clit, pressing enough to have you moaning out loud. Steph hushes you softly. "Shhh pretty girl, we don't wanna be too loud. Wouldn't want to draw attention, would we?"

You obediently bite down on your lip, but it's then Caitlin decides is the perfect moment to lick a stripe up your slit and your mouth drops open. Steph is quick to let go of your wrist to silence you. Leaving your left hand free, but you only grip onto the white sheets, fisting them tightly.

The moan reverberates from your throat, though, and almost echoes in the room.

The smirk on the strikers face tells Steph that was entirely intentional. Not that you're paying much attention to that at this point. You can only focus on the feeling of her arms pulling your legs over her shoulders, holding her head closer to your centre.

"Careful."

It's a light scold, but Caitlin raises a brow cheekily. It's when she dives straight into your wetness, lapping at you before sucking harshly at your clit, that you know she'll be in trouble later. You're preening under the heat of her tongue, and her teeth have you shuddering when she tugs gently.

The knot in your stomach twists in on itself almost immediately, leaving you embarrassingly close to the edge already. She could tell immediately after she slips two fingers into you, pressing inside you just right, leaving you almost fluttering around the digits. Your chest is heaving, breath hot and heavy coming from your nose and into the palm of Steph's hand, intermittent with occasional cries of pleasure.

It's in this moment you realise she's dead set on making you cum as quickly as possible, though that doesn't surprise you given she's always competing with the other girl on how quickly they can get you to finish. You'd never had the heart to tell them who was winning that competition, besides, it certainly didn't hurt when they got into a competitive mood like this, especially with such a big win.

With a particularly harsh suck, and a loud keening whine escapes your throat, you're sent over the edge as your heels dig into the clothed shoulder blades of the girl below you and your other hands fingers intertwine with Steph's. Your hips buck against Caitlin's mouth, and she has to pin your waist down with her other forearm to hold you still.

You're still trembling when you come down, legs shaky as she places one last kiss to your clit before she's being pulled up by Steph into a searing kiss above you. The defender almost growls into the kiss, tongue quickly finding its way into the younger of the two's mouth.

When she feels you nudge her by the hip and your hands slip up under her shirt from beneath her, she pulls away, hand gripping Caitlin by the throat, not quite gentle but enough to cut off air.

"Since pretty girl here wants us to make some noise, I think we can put that mouth to use again. What do you think, puddin'?"

You pull yourself out from under them, hands tugging at her shirt as an idea pops to mind. You chuckle darkly.

"How about we turn that mouth into a nice seat for you?"

Caitlin's pupils dilate a little as she's holding direct eye contact with Steph and Steph's eyes darken with grin.

"Perfect idea, baby girl, down on the bed, pretty girl."

Caitlin can barely get a word out before her shirt and bra are basically tugged from her, and she's pushed onto the bed with a rough grunt. Though she has complaints. Steph steps off the bed for a moment to strip completely before she's hovering over the striker, head near the side of the mattress.

Unbeknownst to her, you're currently knelt in front of her, Steph facing you, watching as you give a smirk, gently running your hands over the muscled thighs in front of you, making her jump at the touch.

However, She's quick to pull the blonde brunette down onto her mouth, diving straight in and not wasting any more time than necessary. Steph has to quickly slap a hand over her own mouth to cover a moan as she leans down on the other, which is placed on Caitlin's abs.

Your eyes are hazy watching the two, and when you blink back to, you slip a hand back up to her slit, running a single digit over it before slipping it into her. Caitlin whines below the defender at your touch, urging you on with a small jump of her hips. You abide and slip another in, her warmth clenching around your fingers as you slowly move them. Your mouth soon joins when Steph lets out soft curses and words of encouragement. Which gives you another moment of clarity.

The moment you can feel Caitlin start to tighten around, you slow your ministrations, making the girl on the bed protest.

"Ah ah." You scold lightly. "You don't cum until she does pretty girl."

Your words make Steph herself moan, and she's nearly thrown over the edge by that alone, Caitlin on the other hand, just about doubles her efforts, tongue flicking harshly and sucking on Steph's clit, and you have a smug look on your face as you return to a moderate pace.

It's when Steph has to steady herself as her thighs tighten around Caitlins head that you curl your fingers just enough in a way you know makes the girl finish every time, paired with a particularly sharp suck and both of them tip over the edge, Steph cumming just before the girl below her, hand tight over her mouth to cover any noises leaving her, Caitlin's own moans being muffled by the girl on top of her.

With a shaky breath, Steph carefully pulls away from Caitlin's head after a tap to the leg from the girl and leans back against the headboard as both of them try to catch their breath, Caitlin more so given she was nearly smothered.

You slip up onto the matress with them, kissing both of them, honestly ready to call it in, but Steph has other ideas.

"Not yet, puddin', I think you still have a couple more in you."

Caitlin sits up suddenly with a grin. She looks directly at Steph with a knowing look, and the girl nods at her.

The striker pushes you back down onto the bed. This time, your head lay on the pillows as the other crosses the room to her suitcase, pulling out a dark green and yellow pouch.

What she pulls out of it both almost makes you laugh and moan at the same time. "Really?" Is what comes out instead.

They both laugh, and Steph shakes her head, "I'm not the one who picked it, but I didn’t mind. We have one in Arsenal colours already anyway."

The strap in her hand is bottle green and sparkly gold striped, which looks ridiculous, but at the same time, you can't help the pride you feel when you see it.

"Touché."

You grin as you watch her step into it, the harness, tightening it around her waist and legs. Caitlin is about to slip a pillow under your hips when Steph then motions for you to turn over onto your stomach instead.

This sends you reeling back into a dazed state almost, breath hitching when you feel her spread your legs out against the pillow now under your hips, bent back at the knees.

She grips your hips, pulling you just back enough to lift you up enough off the bed to get access to you. She runs her fingers through your folds, dipping two finger into you before bringing them back to her mouth to suck off the juices with a small groan.

She grabs the bottle of lube Caitlin had pulled out of the pouch for her and douses the dildo and a little bit in you as well. She spreads it evenly before tossing the bottle back to the striker.

One hand splayed in the dip in your back, Steph guides the dildo into you with the other before sinking down to the hilt. You gasp and gulp, trying to take in air as she fills you with the silicone toy, your hands gripping at the sheets as your face is buried into the them as well before turning it to the side to look at the mirror attached to the wall.

You watch as her hips press into yours deliciously, holding there until you can give her the go-ahead to continue. You adjust a little to give her more room to move, and she takes it, pulling out slowly and pushing back in a little harsher, leaving you to pant out her name.

She does it again, and you cry out this time as she does it repeatedly before setting a rough pace. She sets herself on her knees as her hips thrust into you roughly, one hand holding you hips, pulling you into her, the other gripping the back of your neck, pushing you into the matress.

Your moans turn louder, and you find yourself chanting Steph's name paired with swears as you clench your eyes shut with a grit of your teeth.

Suddenly, she slows much to your disapproval, and with a tut, she turns your head back to face the mirror. "Watch me fuck you baby girl, or you dont get to come again."

You nod, and she picks up her pace again, pounding you into the pillow, your ass bouncing every time she thrusts into you. It throws you closer with every nudge of your g-spot and sends you gasping into the open air of the bedroom.

"F-fuck Steph!".

Meanwhile, you can see Caitlin in the mirror, pupils dilated as she watches the defender fuck a you shaped indent into the matress. However, she slips off the bed, and you find out why, snatching up the underwear she tossed earlier, she balls it up and uses it to muffle you.

Your eyes roll back when she does, and Steph has to hold back her own orgasm at the sight, feeling you tighten around the strap, starting to push back to meet her thrusts. You almost push up to your elbows, but she only doubles down on you, and you cry out into the soaked fabric, vision blurring, and your thighs clench around hers from the back as your orgasm rips through you, Steph soon joining you afterwards with a muffled cry of her own, hips shuddering as she slows her thrusts, a slew of curses and praises leaving you preening as you just manage to hear them over your heart beating into your ears.

Caitlins hand rests on the girl's back, rubbing gently as she unclips the strap from her hips suddenly.

You shiver when the strap is pulled from you, and Steph has to push herself up to go sit on the other bed. However, you nearly protest hearing the clips of the strap being clipped back in again, and she turns you over onto your back.

"Jesus baby, I don't think I can-." You're cut off by your own moan when she kneels down to lap at you for a few moments, as she raises s questioning brow at you.

"I- oh- for the love of- oh- okay! Okay!" You just about squeak out.

She chuckles and lines you back up, hands on your hips, thumbs dipping into your hips bones to pull you down onto the strap once again.

Not waiting a second longer, she's pounding into you with the same ferocity, panting into your neck as she settles on her feet and elbows. Your legs wrap around her waist as she fucks you. Your vision is already starting to blur again, only this time the sensitivity is higher, leaving you canting and bucking as she takes you.

Your hands grip onto her shoulder blades, fingers digging into the skin of her back, panties still settled between your teeth. Your nails bite into her back, and she has to hold back a growl of pleasure. She loves it when you and Steph mark her, leave bites and scratches in her skin when she fucks you both. Her ego is only boosted by the shouts of pleasure she draws out of you two.

To which, when she hears you cry out louder, she fastens her pace, doubling down and angling her hips slightly more up to hit your spot better. With that, your vision goes flash hot white as you release with a muffled scream.

Caitlin cries out with you, hips jutting, and she moans when she feels the mess you've left on the fronts of her hips and thighs and the sheets below you.

Slowly moving to bring you down, she stops and waits for your breathing to slow as she pulls out of you. You gasp, finally feeling empty as the strap is unclipped and tossed at the suitcase once again, the girl just about collapsing on top of you, still placed with your legs around her.

Steph gets up off her own bed with a slight wobble, and that's when you notice the lack of feeling in your trembling legs. You let out a laugh of disbelief, and Caitlin can only smugly grin, one at having made you squirt and two at having left you with jelly legs. It's only happened two other times, and they were both times done by Steph.

You yank the pillow from under you both and toss it at the doorway to sneak into the wash later.

Steph helps you onto your side, having grabbed a cloth from the bathroom and carefully wipes you down.

If it wasn't for the fact they were professional athletes on a high, you'd be amazed by the energy they still had in them after all of that and 90 minutes of gameplay. After that, both of them clean themselves with a relatively quick cloth bath and settle back into bed with you as you begin to doze slowly. Caitlin settles against your back, and Steph settles against your front.

They both wrap their arms around you, bringing the single bed sheet up to cover what they can of the three of you. Your breathing finally recovered. You press a deep but slow kiss to Steph's lips, and Caitlin sits up on her elbow, so you do the same with her. The mumble whispered words of affirmation against your skin.

"God I fucking love you both."

They both laugh, hands caressing your face, shoulder and hip. "We love you too baby girl."

_________

Breakfast the next morning is a shit show. Emily can't quite look you all in the eye, though she does poke fun at Steph, and Sam lets rip into you about keeping her up for three whole hours. Katrina just shakes her head, rubbing her temples, glad she remembered earplugs for Harper before she left sweden.

The other girls who were out had returned just an hour later to find a dead looking Sam, Mini, and Em, and they all nodded at Caitlin and Steph's door. Of course, they all then just layed into the three of you, teasing and pointing out visible hickeys, Charlie poking the most fun at you, with several hickeys now visble on your collarbone as you sit there with your face in your hands at the day ahead of you all.

"Y/L! CATLEY! FOORD!."

"Oh shit." Caitlin.

Steph just facepalms.

Sam looks vindicated but slightly scared for you at the same time.

All the other girls just ooh and whistle at you all.

Except for Mini, she just slaps you upside the head and glares as you all walk away in a way that only mothers can.

All you can mutter as you all skulk into the meeting room where a furious looking Gustafson is standing, is.

"Here we go."

*Oh my lord, and we're done folks, here you guys go.

[thatdeadaquarius]

OKAY BUT I HAVE MORE IDEA FOR BLUNT READER CUZ I LOVE THAT AU SO MUCHANDMDJFKSLDKF

So you know how french people's insult are always outta pocket (from a person who's first language is french I can tell you that no other language compares in insult -apart for African languages)

Like,, some "bad" insult here would be : bitch, fuck off, whore,..

Which we can all agree is boring...

BUT THEN IN FRENCH!!!

We be getting creative with it

Eg.

"mange tes mort" wich translates to "eat your dead (relatives)"

"vas te fair enculer" means "go get yourself pegged in the ass"

(yes, we have a specific word for being fucked in the ass 💀)

AND THOSE WOULD BE THE COMMON ONES AS WELL

English could never compare ✨

BUT ANYWAYS

how would the characters react if reader was from france/ belgium/ canada(or any other french speaking country) and started cursing people out like they eould do in their home countrie !?!?

The eay their face would drop

We would make a couple of people cry

AND GOD(us haha) FORBID A KID OVER-HEAR US AND STARTS REPEATING US

Trying to un-teach them would be hell *cries*

Your thoughts?

Love yaaaa~

ABSOLUTE TOP TIER ORAH MY BELOVED!!

Nobody has any idea how much I HATE ENGLISH both for its rules/pronounciation BS/etc. But also, most importantly, THERES LIKE NO GOOD CUSS WORDS- OR LIKE CUSS PHRASES??

I HAD TO PUT THIS GIF BC THAT WAS LITERALLY ME WHEN I HAD THE REALIZATION TO LOOK UP OTHER LANGUAGE CUSS WORDS AND I WAS JUST BLOWN AWAY BY HOW GOOD THEY WERE- HOW CREATIVE- 😫😭🥲 ENGLISH WHY R U SO SHITY IN EVERY POSSIBLE LANGUAGE SITUATION-

like idk we got "eat shit and die / fuck off / go fuck yourself" ???? Like- thats pathetic 😟.

I love hearing someone just cuss smbody out their native language/non-english, it’s so badass and cool to see

Anyway u already know i love non-native english speakers from the bottom of my heart✨️

GOD I FUCKING LOVE BLUNT LANGUAGE AU ITS LIKE ONE OF TOP FAV AS U CAN PROBABLY GUESS I COULD WRITE A LITERAL FANFIC ENTIRELY OFF THIS SIMPLE PREMISE 💖💓💗💞❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

omg so i HAVE SPECIFICALLY HEARD ABT FRENCH BEING RLLY CREATIVEEE

and i researched french cusswords/phrases,,,

😭 BRO IM CRYING

“bête comme ses pieds!” IM ROLLING ON THE FLOOR-

(trans: you’re as stupid AS YOUR FEEEEEETT)

idk what’s funnier, you translating urself in real time and saying all these phrases to ppl,

OR just scaring the ever-loving shit out of every teyvat citizen within a mile radius bc oh wow- you look pissed, so yeah somebody’s about to lose all their self-esteem for the rest of their life bc ur insults are known to be extra cutting bc ur so blunt-

OH CREATOR ABOVE (…oh creator, present??)- you changed to your holy language FOR THIS???

everybody just giving the npc the most bombastic side-eye for pushing you to do this,

or even just you stubbing ur toe/ate food when it was too hot

or my favorite, getting onto ppl like Wanderer when they do smth silly lmao

STOP I HAD A FOUL THOUGHT OF GETTING ONTO Ei AND WANDERER (like ei for not keeping him/at least giving him to someone else to raise, then all the shit he did as Scaramouche lol)

AND THIS CUSSWORD COMES OUT UNDER UR BREATH OR SMTH- DOES THIS FIT BC THIS KILLS ME:

“Putain de salope…” (whore of whore, I LIED IT MEANS FUCKING BITCH LMAO😭)

JUST GETTING THE MOM AND THE SON IN ONE FULL BREATH CRYINGGGG

STOPPP wanderer using it against other ppl ever since u used it lol

oh no stop dont bring the kids into thisss 😭😭

Klee would deffo be the first one to pick up ur words and use them, omg she just uses them as catchphrases like when throwing her bombs 💀

“Mange tes mort!” JUST WITH A SMILE ON HER FACE AS SHE THROWS HER HUGE SKILL BOMB INTO A FISH POND

Venti would definitely make sure the winds “pass along phrases of the sacred All-God language!”

which just means anyone who UNDERSTANDS YOU JUST GETS GENTLY CREATIVELY CUSSED OUT BY THE WIND IM SOBBINGGG

☆

i hope u guys are having a great summer! its basically too hot to go outside where I am, not unless ur going straight into the water or smth

which hey, ill be doing that this weekend, floating down the river about an hour away from my house with friends! :]

which,,, if anyone sees this, U GOTTA HELP ME THINK OF A 1000 FOLLOWERS MILESTONE THING TO DO IDK WHAT TO DO BUT I WANNA CELEBRATE IT BC I NEVER THOUGHT THATD HAPPEN!! lmk what u think in the comments if u read this!

☆

Safe Travels 0rah,

💀♒

♡the beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche / @chocogi

[allthecanadianpolitics]

Pledges from both the B.C. NDP and Conservative Party of B.C. to expand the use of forced treatment for people with addictions or severe mental health issues is being met with pushback from some residents of B.C. — as well as Canada's federal addictions minister. On Friday, people living in Prince George — one of the cities hardest-hit by the illicit drug overdose crisis — held a rally on the steps of the Prince George courthouse, urging political leaders to work first on expanding options for voluntary treatment across B.C. rather than focusing on compulsory care. "We need free treatment beds. We need rapid access to detox and no wait list," said one of the rally's organizers, Corrine Woods. A member of Moms Stop the Harm, she said she lost her own son to an overdose in 2018 and knew first-hand the difficulty of accessing care. 

Continue Reading

Tagging: @newsfromstolenland

[watermelllonarchive]

Updated and reorganized the resources post (pinned on my blog) but wanted to share in a separate post as well <3

Resources

To see the most up-to-date version of this post, see my pinned post.

A note on ownership: I don't own these videos. The creators of these videos want me to remove their content, contact me through DM and I'll do so. :)

1. Go Fund Me

I'm making a list of every Go Fund Me or donation link from accounts shared on this blog! If you have interacted with the posts or felt moved by the stories they shared, please consider donating to help them and their families. (Note: not all accounts shared on watermelllonarchive have GFM or other fundraising campaigns.)

Click on names to see their previous posts!

Listed alphabetically by first name

Abdallah Zaqout - GFM for evacuating his family (Link) Update: Abdallah was able to evacuate in March 2024, but his family remains in Gaza.

Abdel Kouta - GFM for Abdel (Canadian citizen) to return to his wife and kids in Canada. (Link) Update: Abdel has left Gaza. The GFM is still open to help cover living expenses.

Ahmed Younis - GFM to help him evacuate Gaza. (Link)

Amir Gharabawi - GFM to help evacuate his family (link) Update: Amir and a few family members have left Gaza. The GFM is still open to cover living expenses and safe passage for his siblings.

Anas Matar - GFM to help rebuild his home (link)

Ashraf and Aboud Almajaida - GFM to help them and their family (link)

Asma Al-shaikh- While Asma has evacuated, there is an ongoing GFM to help her family and fiance leave Gaza. (link)

Bashar Zaneen - GFM to help evacuate him and his mother (link) Update: Bashar evacuated Gaza in May. His family, including his mom, are still in Gaza and the GFM remains open.

Hasan Almoghani - GFM to help Hasan and his family in Northern Gaza afford food and necessities (link)

Hosam Soboh - GFM to help rebuild his home and business (link)

Kholoud Nassar - GFM to support her family in Gaza (link)

Mahmoud Alghrbawi - GFM to help evacuate his family (link)

Maram Alshurafa - GFM for evacuating her family (link)

Medo Halimy- GFM to support his and his family's evacuation. (Link)

Meera Asfour - GFM to support her family and help them evacuate (link)

Nadia Abu Shaban - GFM for evacuating her family (link) Update: Nadia and her family evacuated in May 2024.

Nisreen Shehada - GFM to evacuate her family who remains in Gaza (link) Update: Nisreen left Gaza in late March. Her family is still in Gaza and were scheduled to leave the day IOF took Rafah Crossing.

Nour Elhouda Musabeh (Nouur97) - GFM to help her and her family afford food and other essentials. (Link)

Rahaf Shamaly - GFM for her family to join her in Egypt. (link)

Sami Alsultan - GFM to help Sami and his family rebuild (link)

Shoroq Isawi- GFM to help her family evacuate. (link) Update: Shoroq evacuated March 2024. Her family is still in Gaza and the GFM remains open.

Tala Darwish - GFM to support her studies and evacuation from Gaza (link)

2. Actions

Contacting Representatives

Canada - MPs by Constituencies

CJPME tool to help call representatives

leadnow.ca script and tracker to call your representatives

Amnesty International

United States - Federal, state, and local representatives

5calls website to help call your reps

Action Network form to write to your representatives

USPCR advice and scripts for contacting congress

Jewish Voices for Peace

Need a script?

Humanti Project has some messages for emailing representatives, which you can use or take as inspiration.

Form letters and email campaigns

These links allow you to send a pre-written email. Just enter your contact information!

Jewish Voices for Peace (USA)

Congress: demand Biden reinstate UNRWA finding

President Biden: demand an immediate ceasefire now

US Campaign for Palestinian Rights (USA)

Email Congress: End the Gaza Genocide

Email universities: Divest now and stop repressing protests

Medial Aid for Palestinians (UK)

Email your MP: Protect Palestinians in Gaza Against Atrocities

Petitions

USCPR: Demand Biden and Congress Acknowledge the ICC’s Authority and Put a Stop to the Genocide in Gaza

Amnesty International: Demand a ceasefire by all parties to end civilian suffering

Buying eSims

Purchase internet access for someone in Gaza with eSims for Gaza

Daily Clicks

Arab.org - Watch an advertisement, and the money goes to the UNRWA. (View their quarterly donation receipts here)

3. Conflicts across the globe

While this blog focuses on Palestine, there are other conflicts that deserve our attention. Please consider donating what you can to one or more of the charities below, or share the links with friends and family.

Democratic Republic of the Congo 🇨🇩

7 million people have been displaced due to violence between armed groups and government. Millions more face disease, starvation, and continued violence.

Focus Congo - founded in 2016 by a Congolese refugee Pappy Orion who escaped the Congo during the first and second Congo Wars of the late 1990s.

Help Women in the Democratic Republic of Congo- This effort, organized and run by Women for Women International, supports Congolese women escape violence and recover through education, job training, access to doctors, and cash assistance.

Sudan 🇸🇩

Violence between opposing factions of the Sudanese security forces have resulted in over 8.5 million people being displaced and millions more struggling to access food, medicine, and safety.

CARE International Switzerland - CARE has been in Sudan before the current conflict and runs programs helping refugees.

International Rescue Committee - IRC has increased their ongoing efforts in Sudan and have launched new programs to address water and sanitation.